#thinking about him collecting things that make him laugh
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catalinasroom · 24 hours ago
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jjk fics that have my whole heart
As time goes on, more will be added!
ryomen sukuna
he's (not) my man @indiewritesxoxo
in a last ditch effort to save your family's failing ranch, your father arranges your marriage to a man you've never met. now you've got an even bigger problem - a six foot something one who clearly can't stand you either. looks like navigating newlywed life is going to be a little tough when he's already talking about divorce! (series)
knocked out up @indiewritesxoxo
getting back shots in someone else's bed post-breakup is fun - until you have a bump to show for it a few months later (series)
she wont go away @saatorus
of all the people in your chemistry course, you get stuck with ryomen sukuna—the most insufferable, arrogant asshole on campus. he barely does any work, runs his mouth like it’s a sport, and somehow manages to make your life even more exhausting than it already is. if this project doesn’t kill you, he just might. (26k)
Saturou Gojo
soft as it began @gojover
district four’s only victors—satoru gojo, dazzling and deadly, and you, cunning and stubborn—are dragged back into the arena for the quarter quell. with the capitol watching and a rebellion brewing, the hunger games are no longer just about survival. they’re about trust, betrayal, and the unresolved past that still burns between you. (tbd)
Law of Attraction @shokocide
Newton said the smaller the distance, the stronger the pull. Gojo Satoru thinks that explains the way he feels when you’re close. (18.2k)
Just Friends @madamechrissy
a guide to ditching the world's most persistent nerd @sixeyesonathiel
gojo satoru has been the bane of your existence since kindergarten. he rejected your chocolates, ignored your attempts at friendship, and solidified himself as the most insufferable nerd you've ever met. years later, you're a party girl with a trust fund and a talent for avoidance, and he's still everywhere—top of his class, heir to an empire, and somehow, still your problem. (series)
love Comes in Small Sizes @sixeyesonathiel
you and gojo satoru have always been a thing—never defined, never simple. he’s reckless with his wounds (and your heart), you’re the only one who can patch him up, and neither of you will admit what you really want.
but when life tears you apart, the universe sends a tiny, glitter-covered reminder that some bonds can’t stay broken forever. (series)
free Throws and Figure Drawings @sixeyesonathiel
satoru gojo is many things—basketball star player, campus menace, objectively the best-looking guy in any room—but he is not a model. so when you, some quiet, intense art student, shove a flyer in his face and ask him to pose for a painting, his first instinct is to laugh. his second instinct is to say no.
it’s supposed to be easy money. sit still, look pretty, collect cash. but between your infuriating perfectionism, your absolute refusal to be flustered by him, and the way you stare like you’re trying to figure him out, satoru starts to suspect he’s in way over his head (22k)
Coming down @writesvani
You and Gojo Satoru were once everything to each other, but now, the space between you is filled with nothing but silence and resentment. College is just a reminder of how far you’ve drifted apart, and every encounter only adds fuel to the fire.
You avoid him like the plague, but it doesn’t matter. You can still feel him in the shadows, always there, always watching, as if the past was never really gone. So what do you do? You (try to) keep your distance, pretending it’s easy to forget the history that’s weighed you down for so long.
But deep down, neither of you can let go. And as the tension between you grows, you’re forced to confront the truth: some things are never truly buried, no matter how hard you try. (series)
Velvet Lies @joemama-2
crippling debt and possible evictions have ruined you. working two jobs with no downtime, and a five-year-old son, you really don't know the meaning of taking a break. after continuous questions about his father, you have decided to finally let your son meet his dad. only thing is, he has no idea said son exists. and to top it off, you have not a single clue about what kinds of things will transpire from this sudden revelation. (series)
Megumi Fushiguro
lets play ball @lokissweater
“ won’t you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor? ”  (series)
not even a little @gumii-bearr
megumi fushiguro is your roommate, he's also a scary guy... a scary guy that's weak for you. (13.8k)
I'm already Yours @gumii-bearr
megumi learns to be honest with you and tell you what he wants. (9.3k)
you Hitting on me? @gumii-bearr
megumi doesn't like clubs, but then he sees you. (4k)
Kigatsukeba @manicpixiedreamkira
Suguru Geto
no. one Party Anthem @indiewritesxoxo
your best friend has always been an asshole - whether it's in his band or in his bed. him ditching you? nothing new. but when one bedroom door closes, another one opens (series) ft. ryomen sukuna
how to baby trap marry your best friend @indiewritesxoxo
best friend or baby daddy, one thing's for sure, you're not getting rid of him!
All I Need @dihydromorphinone
well - your high school teachers warned you. college sucks - it's hard, unforgiving and ruthless. and you have to pay for it. ha! but.. there is some good to it, you think, as you see your psychology professor - and damn, he's hot. as fuck.
it seems that fate had some mercy on you; your major is psychology, so you'll be spending most of your time at the university at his lectures. and he's such a fucking eye-candy. but little did you know... fate binding you two together was not an act of mercy, no - rather ruthless cruelty, because your crush on the professor seems to develop. but you can't cross that line, right? ...right? (series)
Choso Kamo
hey emo boy! @gojonanami
saw this boy at the mall last week. got the kind of look to make me freak. wanna fuck in the back of the hot topic? (5.3k)
Hey, Emo boy! @shokocide
Choso doesn’t do distractions. But then you walk into his show and ruin his focus with one look. And now, he’s handing you his guitar, his heart, maybe more. And baby, you haven’t even seen what those fingers can really do.(10.5k)
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paucubarsisimp · 2 days ago
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𝐋𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨 𝐍𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐲𝐩𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨…
➳ always sending you random memes or videos that he thinks will make you laugh (and he’s probably laughing more than you)
➳ insists on giving you piggyback rides whenever you’re tired or just for fun
➳ loves teasing you about how cute you look when you’re trying to concentrate on something
➳ definitely has a collection of your favorite snacks in his room or car just in case
➳ sends you a selfie every time he’s at the racetrack, asking if you think he looks “race car driver cool”
➳ loves sending you little surprises, like tickets to something you’ve been wanting to do, or just something he thought would make you smile
➳ insists on driving you places just so he can hold your hand while he’s driving
➳ can’t resist putting his arm around you while you’re watching a movie, even if he claims he’s not the cuddly type
➳ gets super shy and blushy whenever you tell him something sweet, but can’t stop smiling like a dork
➳ will casually ask for advice from his friends about how to be a better boyfriend (but it’s more for reassurance than actual advice, haha)
➳ randomly calls you while he’s in the middle of something, just to tell you something funny that happened, even if it’s not that important
➳ constantly makes sure you’re comfortable, like adjusting your seat, or checking if you need a jacket, and always stealing little peeks to see if you’re happy
➳ will press kisses to the back of your hand or your forehead when you’re not looking, just because he loves you
➳ probably makes the worst breakfast in the world, but it’s the most adorable thing because he’s so excited about it
➳ never lets you leave without a hug and a kiss, even if it’s just a quick “see you later”
➳ always shows up with flowers or something cute because he knows you’ll appreciate the little things
➳ when he’s tired, he loves resting his head on your lap and letting you play with his hair, even if he pretends it’s a “guy thing” to do
➳ whenever he’s away racing, he’ll send you pictures of random things he sees that remind him of you, like a nice view or a silly sign
➳ loves when you give him compliments, but he acts like he’s not used to it and gets all shy, even though it makes his whole day
➳ no matter how busy he is, he’ll always make time to send you a quick “thinking of you” message
➳ takes every chance to hold your hand in public, but he’s also a little nervous when people are watching—he just thinks you’re so cute
small little fluffy imagine:
the morning light seeps in gently through the curtains, warm and golden, but not enough to tempt you out of bed. not when lando’s wrapped around you like this—like he’s trying to become a part of you.
his legs are tangled with yours, arms tucked tightly around your waist, and his face is buried in your shoulder, his breath soft and steady against your skin. every time you move even slightly, he holds on tighter.
“don’t go,” he mumbles, voice thick with sleep, words slurring together. “not yet.”
you smile, your fingers lazily threading through his messy curls. “i wasn’t going anywhere.”
“good,” he breathes, pressing the softest kiss just under your jaw. “you’re warm. and you smell nice.”
his hold on you tightens for a second before he relaxes again, cheek smushed against you, completely content.
“you’re like a human space heater,” you tease quietly.
“and you’re my favorite blanket,” he replies, not missing a beat, even half-asleep. “i need you. for survival.”
you laugh under your breath, shifting just enough to look at him. his eyes are still closed, lashes fluttering slightly, a sleepy smile tugging at his lips. he looks so peaceful here, like the rest of the world doesn’t even exist when he’s with you.
he opens one eye slowly. “what are you looking at?”
“you,” you whisper.
he grins, leans up just enough to kiss your nose, then your cheek, then your lips—soft and slow and lazy, like there’s all the time in the world. “i like when you do that.”
“what?”
“look at me like i’m your whole world,” he says, voice barely audible as he pulls you impossibly closer. “because you’re mine.”
your heart melts. completely. hopelessly.
“lando…”
“shh,” he murmurs. “just stay. forever, maybe.”
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taglist: @barcapix, @universefcb, @joaosnovia, @ilovebarcaaaa, @levidazai, @hollyf1,@mxryxmfooty, @halfwayhearted lmk if you want to be added!
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prosypepper · 13 hours ago
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hi mootie, here’s a good morning forehead smooch 💋
i’m looking for a f!plus size x toji fic 🥀 my obsession with his grimy ass has came back ten fold.
maybe something along the lines of being his ‘bestie’ (let’s be so fr this man has NO friends.) and he invites u to the beach so he doesn’t have to go with just shiu or sum like that…
sees u in a revealing swimsuit n goes bonkers. OR MAYBE kinda like a comfort bc reader doesn’t feel good in the suit…
even if u choose not to write this it still felt great to get out of my system, ily pls don’t go bald mwah
BABE MY LOVE I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE U BACK ON THE DASH!!! I MISSED YOUUUUUUU!!!!! also i have some thoughts………ur so smart.
a/n: smut, comfort of insecurities, plus size fem reader, this is lowkey SO BAD and im so sorry but i wanted to do this for u 🫶🫶🫶 18+ mdni!
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“where have you been hiding that?”
toji whistles when you walk out of the bathroom you’d been forced to share for the weekend, sleazy grin on his face from where he’s sitting on the bed.
“you’ve seen me naked like four times,” you retort, climbing onto the bed beside him to rummage through your bag of clothes, “also i’m changing. i look disgusting.”
toji’s taken aback by your statement, utterly dumbfounded at a pretty thing like you saying such harsh things about herself. he’d never denied how attractive he thought you were, always flirting and riling you up when he had the chance. hell, you guys had even fucked before, albeit on all sorts of drugs, but now?
toji thought you looked better sober. you’re the first girl he’d ever thought that about, too, even if he wouldn’t admit it.
“disgusting?” he repeats after you, word tweaking into a question.
“yes, disgusting. gross, ugly, nasty, whatever. i hate this stupid bikini but i didn’t have the cash to buy a new one,” you complain, still angrily shoving through your bag and getting angrier when you didn’t find anything to cover up with.
“babydoll,” toji coos, smoothing a hand over your back, “what makes you say that?” toji’s voice is dropped lower, concerned, almost. it was so unlike you to say such a thing. toji didn’t care for many people, but you’d been there for him in the most trying of times, there was no way he’d let you think that about yourself.
especially when he was about to lose it at just the sight of you.
“i just..” you sigh, slumping your shoulders, “i don’t know. i just feel so gross now, like nothing looks good on me and i just feel so ugly. like i’m surprised you’re not embarrassed to be seen with me—.”
“woah, slow down,” he interrupts, taking a breath to collect his thoughts, keeping the soothing hand on your back. “you’re.. damn gorgeous, y’know that. i tell you all the time.”
“yeah but that’s different, we’re friends, plus we only had sex when you were drunk or whatever so obviously you have to be in an altered state to wanna—,”
“stop.”
you’re shut up immediately, looking at toji confused, because why did he care so much? the both of you hold eye contact before toji’s eyes flicker down, causing you to do the same—down his chest and torso, right to the tent in his swim trunks.
“toji!” you laugh, shoving his chest—and toji just grins. cocky.
“that’s all you, babe.”
“you’re so gross.”
“show me how gross you think i am.”
“toji!”
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“yeah, baby, scream my name just like that.”
there’s barely room for you to get any words out with the way toji’s stretching you out on the counter of the bathroom. you’re teetering on the edge of the marble, the only thing holding you up are toji’s arms and the desperate grip you have around his neck.
fifteen minutes ago you were complaining about your looks.. and now, he won’t even give you the chance to complain. your bikini bottoms are pulled to the side and the top is resting below your tits, showing all of you off to him.
you’re beautiful like this.
“so fuckin’ pretty,” toji mumbles, looking down at your blissed expression—eyes glued shut, eyebrows knitted together, mouth dropping open and closing with miniscule whimpers. “hold on tight, doll.”
without much warning, toji picks you up with one motion, holding your legs around him with strong hands. a slew of words come out as you try to tell him he’s going to drop you—but you never hit the floor. he’s still for a moment as he slides himself allll the way in, practically stabbing your cervix, you’re sure.
“fucking—pleaseplease, wait,” you babble, not used to the stretch of toji’s cock inside of you, “too much—it’s, mmph—toji.”
“too much, gorgeous?” he chuckles, cute name slipping off his tongue naturally, laughing more when you nod quickly. yet he does anything but pause, bouncing you up and down on his length like you’re weightless.
“sorry, pretty. can’t help myself.”
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onlyquinns · 16 hours ago
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that photo of kess, his veiny hands... the tattoo... i fear I'm going feral. can i possibly request one where kess goes absolutely crazy when reader surprises him with a small tattoo of his name and/or number where only he can see it.... so.... smutty pls if youre up for it. And maybe a little extra, when he turns up to practice the guys tease him cause his back is totally scratched up from the night before. thanks darling!!!
okay need to be sedated now, that photo has me going mad.
he sees it by accident. you’d honestly forgot you had it, barely able to see it yourself. you’d gotten his initials number tattooed on your hip—just above the bone—weeks ago, a little surprise you wanted to show him for finishing his first season with a completely new nhl team. obviously, you’d forgotten to show him.
michael’s watching you in your little bikini, wiggling to get comfy in the sun lounger, and that’s when he sees it. at first, it just looks like a smudge of black in your skin—but after squinting past the sunlight, he makes out a little mk7 in a dainty font. he immediately abandons his spot by the sliding glass door, his beer can forgotten by the grill as he walks over.
before you can even take your sunglasses off, michael settles over you, bracketing thick thighs over your hips. “when did you get it?” he asks, watching with blown pupils as you scrunch your brows like you don’t know what he’s talking about.
and you don’t.
“get what?” you ask, setting your book down on the hot concrete under you. you pull your shades off and set them on top of your book, michael’s large body blocking the sun from even touching you.
michael rolls his eyes, playing mean and it makes your cheeks warm even more in the summer heat. his hand cups your hip, right over your tattoo, and it clicks. he pinches and prods the skin there, and you whine.
“when did you get this?” he asks, lightly pinching the little tattoo to emphasize its existence. you look up at him and get lost in his face, his eyes dark and half lidded. “c’mon, baby, answer the question,” he growls, pressing his hips down into you so you can feel the hand outline of him through your bikini. hi hand trails over the waistline, pulling it back and snapping it against your skin.
you swallow, mind suddenly hazy and pupils blown just as big as michael’s. “a few days ago,” you murmur, “do you… do you like it?”
michael laughs, the sound so deep and throaty that it has you involuntarily squeezing your thighs together, slick pooling uncomfortably in between your legs. “you’ve no idea,” he whispers.
you’re unable to respond, words stolen from your mouth as you feel michael’s long fingers pull your bottoms to the side. he eyes you hungrily as his fingers make contact with your clit, drawing a loud squeak from you.
“why didn’t you tell me you got it?” he asks, fingers dipping lower between your legs and collecting your wetness on his fingers. he looks at you like he’s disappointed.
“i forgot,” you mumble. “you got so caught up with other hockey stuff—like… like the usa hockey thing.” you chew on your bottom lip and michael chuckles, as if to say that isn’t a good excuse. “i promise to tell you next time,” you say softly, peering up at him with big doe eyes. the look catches him off guard, sending impossibly more blood to his dick, but he shakes his head when he suddenly feels you grind down on his fingers.
michael pulls his hand away, pulling his large hand from your core to rest on your inner thigh, thumb pulling your pussy open for him to look at. “next time, huh?” he says, eyes only on your cunt and how it drools for him.
you nod, hair rubbing against the sun lounger’s rough cushioning. “y’know…” you start with uncertainty. “when we get married… i think it’d be cute to get your initial on my hand.”
michael groans at your words, “you’re killing me here,” he says lowly. he thumbs at your clit, drawing tight circles around it as he shimmies his swim trunks down.
michael pumps his hand over his dick, eyes flickering up to look at your face, a dark chuckle leaving his lips at the sight of you staring at his cock.
“my girl just like it when people know she’s mine?” he asks, drawing the thick head of his dick through your slick folds.
you nod, “mhm, only yours, mikey,” you say, watching where his dick slides through your folds.
michael grins, smug and cocky, and lines himself up with your entrance. his thumb doesn’t stray from rubbing circles against your clit as he sinks in, your body sucking him in. he couldn’t care any fucking less about being caught; in fact, he wouldn’t mind at all—just another little thing to add to the tattoo of his initials and number that prove you’re his. only his.
you moan as michael thrusts into you, taking his hand away from your clit and gripping your hips. he tilts your hips upward, angling your body just right so that he slams into that spongy spot inside of you over and over. you cry out and wrap your arms around him, freshly manicured nails digging into his back. michael moans, eyes fluttering shut at the sensation of your freshly done acrylics dragging down his back. he knows you’re going to leave a mark, judging by the sharp sting your fingers leave in their wake, but the idea excites him beyond belief.
“fuck,” he groans, hips stuttering for a second as your ankles lock behind his back. “gonna make sure everyone knows i’m yours, yeah? leaving marks all over my back. fuck.”
you barely register his words, too dumb on the feeling of his cock pumping in and out of you. your body trembles in michael’s hold, your climax building to a peak. michael moans as your cunt flutters around him, squeezing and sucking him in as he tries to keep his rhythm.
“‘m gonna cum!” you cry, legs tight around his waist and hands gripping into his shoulders.
the sight of you him—all messy with sex hair and flushed cheeks—has michael drooling. “okay, okay—“ he presses one large palm over your lower stomach, adding more pressure to the push and pull of his dick inside you. you whine loudly with tears forming at the corner of your eyes, body trembling as you hold back on your release until michael gives you the go ahead.
“m-michael!” you whimper, eyes bleary and bottom lip pulled tight between your teeth. the sun lounger feels wet underneath you. “please—please lemme cum! wanna cum!”
michael grins down at you and nods, “okay, baby, cum for me,” he says, voice smug. “c’mon, pretty girl, make a mess on my dick—know you want to.”
you moan and finally allow yourself your climax, the tightly coiled cord in your lower stomach snapping and sending you spiraling. your body trembles as you pant, quick puffs of air leaving your glossed lips. michael smirks, fucking you through your orgasm and him to completion. he holds your hips tight, pressing deep into you and shooting hot ropes of cum into your aching cunt. you whine at the sensation, pulling michael so he smothers you with his body, and pressing your nose into his neck.
michael smooths his hands up from your hips and holds you close to him, feeling the quick rise and fall of your chest. you murmur incoherently into his sweat-damp skin and michael grins to himself.
“don’t think you’re off the hook now,” he whispers into your hair. “i’m not done with you yet, and that tattoo—“ he gives a quick, sharp slap to your hip, “—makes you mine.”
and later that day, when michael finds himself back at the delta center, his teammates whistle and whoop at the sight of his back—all marked up with thin, red lines and a new piece of saniderm on his hip, your initial inked into his smooth skin right where his are on you.
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sawamiyukiss · 2 days ago
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It's Not A Confession! Haitani Rindou x Reader.
Inspired by this fanart from Akarui_0. Source: Pixiv
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Summary: You're asked to deliver a letter to Haitani Rindou but his brother Ran mistakes it as a love confession. It's not a love letter! You swear! Unfortunately, the heart sticker on the envelope doesn’t help your case and neither does Rindou’s reaction
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You never expected a simple task from your homeroom teacher would have your day spiraling like this. As a student council member you often found yourself taking care of classroom duties. Things such as organizing papers, collecting homework assignments, and delivering messages from your teachers to the students or vice versa.
Today was a day like any other. The only exception being that your homeroom teacher had asked you to hand deliver an envelope to Haitani Rindou. He had said it was nothing serious, only that he did not have time to go around looking for the delinquent student.
It was a simple request.
So now, why were you standing in the hallway with the two delinquent Haitani brothers staring at you like you’d just professed your love?
You held out the envelope with both hands, as proper and professional as possible.
“Haitani Rindou-san,” you say clearly. “Please take this letter..”
Rindou stares at your outstretched hands, and slowly glances back to you. His brother besides him can't contain a howled laughter.
Immediately, Rindou’s ears turn red. He doesn’t move to take the envelope.
You tilt your head, clearly confused. Until you notice the sticker on the envelope.
Without really thinking, you had grabbed one of your cute stationery stickers to seal the envelope. Except, it wasn’t just any sticker. No, it was a giant pink heart from a valentine’s set you had jokingly bought not too long ago.
And of course the heart sticker had to be right in the center. And of course you didn’t notice it until just now.
“Oh?” Ran drawls from where he’s lounging behind his younger brother, one arm draped across Rindou’s shoulder. “A love letter? From innocent Marie-chan?” Ran’s eyes sparkle as he teases you.
You felt your face heating up. “I—it’s not a love letter! It’s from our homeroom teacher. She asked me to deliver it!””
You want to crawl into a locker and slam the door shut.Your words tumble out in a breathless rush, and the heat in your cheeks spreads to your ears.
“...So it’s not a confession?” Rindou asks quietly.
You freeze.
That’s the first thing he’s said since you got here. Your heart does something weird in your chest.
“It’s really not,” you manage, but your voice cracks halfway through.
He finally reaches for the envelope, his fingers brushing yours.
“Okay” he mumbles. 
You’re not sure who’s more embarrassed now. Him or you.
Ran, naturally, is having the time of his life. “Man, this is even better than a confession. Look at you two. Blushing like a bunch of middle schoolers. You sure you don’t want to just kiss and make it official now.”
“I have to go!” You don’t wait for a response. You spin on your heel and practically sprint down the hallway.
Behind you, you swear you hear Ran laughing and Rindou telling him to shut up.
You’re hiding in your homeroom class during lunch. You’re sorting through some club request forms when a shadow falls across your desk. 
You look up to see Rindou in front of you. Your heart beats faster.
“I read the letter,” he says. “It was about a makeup assignment.”
You blink.
“Okay.”
There’s a small beat of silence. You can hear the chatter of other students in passing and your own heart thudding in your ears.
“If you,” he says slowly. “Ever wanted to give me a confession letter… I wouldn’t mind the heart sticker.”
You stare at him, dumbfounded.
He looks away, clearly regretting saying anything. “Never mind. Forget it.”
“No,” you say quickly. “I—okay.”
You’re blushing again. “I mean, if I ever did want to give you a confession letter. Then, yes, I’ll use a heart sticker.”
“…Okay,” he blushes.
Neither of you knows what else to say. The blush on both of your faces speaks for itself.
🌸 ⋆。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆ . 🌸 ⋆。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆ 🌸 ⋆。゚。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆ 🌸
🌷✨ More characters and stories coming soon! Thank you for reading! 🌸💌 Requests are Open! 💌🌸 Feel free to send in headcanon ideas, drabble requests, etc! 🎀✨
🔗 Return to Masterlist 🌸 💌 🌸 All my other social media linked here!
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kenzdolls · 2 days ago
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MHA BOYS W/ A DREAM BBQ ENA READER .
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𖤐 synopsis: reader is like dream bbq ena [with the multiple personalities].
𖤐 pairings: izuku midoriya x reader, katsuki bakugou x reader, shoto todoroki x reader, tomura shigaraki x reader, dabi x reader
𖤐 notes: since i’ve been obsessed w/ dream bbq ena, i decided to do this!
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KATSUKI BAKUGOU:
▸ at first, he's completely thrown off by your dual personality - when you're in enthusiastic salesperson mode, he thinks you're annoying as hell, but when you slip into your sassy "meanie" persona, he's actually impressed by your sharp tongue.
▸ eventually realizes that you're one of the few people who can match his energy and isn't intimidated by his explosive personality. you just switch to your sassy side and fire right back at him.
▸ absolutely loves when you're in your salesperson mode around others but immediately switch to your sassy side the moment you two are alone. makes him feel special that he gets to see a side of you that others don't.
▸ would never admit it, but he finds your random color shifts and personality switches fascinating. he's started to notice subtle patterns in when the switches happen.
▸ gets competitive when you're in salesperson mode trying to convince people of things. will absolutely try to one-up you, turning everything into a weird competition of who can be more convincing.
▸ the first time you called him "kacchan" in your enthusiastic voice, he nearly exploded from embarrassment, but now secretly loves it (though he'll never admit it).
▸ protective of you when others don't understand your sudden personality shifts. has definitely snapped at people who made comments about your "weird" behavior.
▸ when you're in your meanie mode and making sassy remarks, he sometimes can't help but laugh out loud. it's one of the few things that can genuinely make him break his angry facade.
▸ has definitely tried to provoke your sassy side on purpose just because he enjoys your quick-witted comebacks. finds it weirdly hot when you don't take his crap.
▸ sometimes when you're having an episode where you're rapidly switching between personalities, he'll sit quietly beside you, not saying much, just being there until you settle.
IZUKU MIDORIYA:
▸ immediately started taking notes about your color changes and personality shifts. has a whole section in his hero notebook dedicated to understanding your patterns.
▸ always concerned about your wellbeing during intense emotional moments when you're switching rapidly between personalities. will hold your hand through the transitions, assuring you that he's there.
▸ loves your enthusiastic salesperson side because it reminds him of all might's public persona - always positive and encouraging to others.
▸ when you're in your meanie mode, he's actually delighted to see this confident, sassy side of you. helps him be more assertive in his own life.
▸ would absolutely defend your unique traits to anyone who didn't understand. "that's just who they are, and it's what makes them special!"
▸ sometimes gets flustered when you switch to your sassy persona mid-conversation and start teasing him mercilessly about his hero worship or his blushing.
▸ has definitely tried to analyze the triggers for your personality switches so he can be better prepared to support you through them.
▸ finds your random facts and bizarre sales pitches endearing rather than strange. will sit and listen to you explain the most random things with genuine interest.
▸ when you're having a difficult day with your dual nature, he'll remind you of how your unique perspective has helped him see the world differently.
▸ has a collection of little gifts you've given him during your enthusiastic phases - random objects you've insisted would "change his life" that he keeps because they remind him of you.
SHOTO TODOROKI:
▸ initially thought your personality shifts mirrored his own internal struggle between his fire and ice sides. found an unexpected kinship with you.
▸ completely unfazed by your sudden personality changes. will just continue the conversation as if nothing happened, which you find incredibly comforting.
▸ appreciates your salesperson enthusiasm because it brings warmth and energy into his often too-serious life. you've taught him it's okay to get excited about things.
▸ when you're in your meanie mode, he actually appreciates your directness. no mind games or hidden meanings - just straightforward honesty, which he values.
▸ often sits in comfortable silence with you, just enjoying your presence regardless of which personality is dominant at the moment.
▸ the first time you switched to your enthusiastic mode around his father, endeavor was completely thrown off, which made shoto secretly smirk.
▸ has started to use your occasional "blue" moments to practice his warming quirk, gently heating up your hands or shoulders to bring you comfort.
▸ finds your random sales pitches and enthusiasm for bizarre things to be a refreshing change from his structured upbringing.
▸ sometimes when you're rapidly switching personalities and feeling overwhelmed, he'll make a small flame in his palm for you to focus on, helping you ground yourself.
▸ has definitely used your enthusiastic salesperson tactics to convince his friends to try new things - "i learned this technique from someone important to me."
TOMURA SHIGARAKI:
▸ initially thought your personality shifts were an act, but once he realized they were genuine, he became fascinated with how similar your fractured sense of self is to his own.
▸ perfectly content to let you ramble in your enthusiastic mode about whatever you're passionate about. it's one of the few things that can actually make him stop scratching his neck.
▸ when you're in your sassy "meanie" mode, he actually respects it because you're not afraid to stand your ground, even against him.
▸ finds a strange comfort in watching your color changes, especially when you're partially blue. something about it reminds him of his own physical differences.
▸ has definitely used your enthusiastic salesperson personality to his advantage when the league needs something. "go convince them we need it."
▸ sometimes when you're stuck in one personality for too long and feeling frustrated, he'll say something intentionally outrageous just to trigger a switch.
▸ weirdly protective of you when others don't understand your nature. has threatened people who mock your sudden switches.
▸ the only person who gets to call you weird is him - and even then, it's with a tone that suggests he thinks "weird" is a compliment.
▸ has moments where he's genuinely gentle with you during difficult transitions between personalities, showing a side of himself that even the league doesn't get to see.
▸ finds your unpredictability oddly comforting in his otherwise calculated world. you're the beautiful chaos in his methodical destruction.
DABI (TOYA TODOROKI):
▸ absolutely lives for your sassy "meanie" mode. the first time you unleashed your sharp tongue on him, he actually laughed out loud, which shocked everyone around.
▸ finds your enthusiastic salesperson side weirdly endearing, even though he'd never admit it. something about your pure enthusiasm for random things is refreshing in his dark world.
▸ completely unfazed by your color changes. once remarked that "at least your color changes are prettier than mine" while gesturing to his purple patches.
▸ has a strange respect for how you navigate your dual nature, seeing parallels to his own journey between touya and dabi.
▸ will absolutely use your enthusiastic side to his advantage, especially when he needs information or access to places. "go work your magic, colorful one."
▸ sometimes when you're rapidly switching personalities and feeling overwhelmed, he'll distract you by asking about whatever random thing you were trying to "sell" earlier.
▸ has threatened people who try to take advantage of your enthusiastic, trusting side. "only i get to do that," (though he never actually would).
▸ oddly patient with your personality shifts. will just light a cigarette and wait for you to cycle through, then continue the conversation where you left off.
▸ the only time anyone has seen him genuinely smile is when you're in full salesperson mode, enthusiastically explaining something completely random that no one else cares about.
▸ when you're having a particularly difficult time balancing your personalities, he'll share a bit of his own struggles with identity, creating a rare moment of genuine connection between you two.
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taglist: [open]
mutuals: @https-bakugo @haikyuubby @va-3 @lotusstarr @tulippanes @gh0st-g1rll @luvseraphh
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sevikasprincesss · 1 day ago
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𐙚 ̊ don't hide from me, you're beautiful ⋆˙⟡
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Chapter Two - Princess in her Tower
sevika x reader ← click for my ao3 for all four chapters.
18+ only (minors and men dni) ✮ word count ── 2500ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
content warnings; nsfw, mature content, smut with storyline, vaginal sex, oral, explicit language, angst, 18+ readers only, reader has female anatomy, sevika top/dominant <3
🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
Sevika smirked at the memory of you, the taste still fresh on her lips. Following Silco into his office, she indulged herself in one last glance of you, now bending over slightly as you stepped into your dress. Sevika bit back a laugh, shutting the door behind her and walking over to the drinks trolley, pouring Silco his usual drink, then hers.
“Care to explain what’s going on between you and my barmaid?” Silco asked, smirking slightly as he sat back in his chair, puffing on his cigar.
“She was getting a bit… over confident, sir,” Sevika says, handing him his drink and sitting in the chair opposite. “She needed to know her place, that’s all.”
“Hmm,” he said, eying her closely. “I trust you saw to that?”
“Thoroughly.” Sevika smirked, taking a swig from her bottle.
“As long as you don’t break her,” he said looking over his papers, “I might need her for the next job.”
✧˖*°✧*°࿐✧˖*°✧*°࿐✧˖*°✧*°࿐✧˖*°✧*°࿐
After slipping my dress on, I quickly began clearing up the bar so I can finish. I absolutely did not want to be here when the pair of them leave his office. In fact, the thought of it was bad enough. I didn’t think I could handle their jokes, taunting, and gods only know what else. All I wanted right now was to collapse into bed and forget about everything—including Sevika.
With all the energy I could muster, I climbed the many stairs to my room, which just happened to be in the attic tower behind the Last Drop. Ever since Silco took over the lanes, this is where I was kept—where I lived. The attic, my home, if you could call it that. This way, I was always close on hand if my services were required, that’s the way he liked it.
My room was originally a dark, dull, and damp room overlooking the lanes through the one window, which had bars on the outside. I could still remember my first night here. Oh how I cried, how I wept, sobbing myself to sleep on the cold hard floor with nothing but the spiders for company.
The memory hung over me like a thick, grey cloud. I shivered, shutting the door behind me and undressing, jumping into the shower.
Over the years, I’d managed to brighten the place up a little bit. I even came to regard it as my little sanctuary… it just happened to be in the same house as the biggest crime lord in Zaun. But I managed to save what little money he gave me for weeks; months, even, just so I could buy two tubs of paint and cover the walls in my favourite colours—pastel pink and yellows.
I painted pink, puffy, rolling clouds on the walls and ceilings, scattered with tiny yellow stars. It wasn’t very good, but it was enough to make me happy. It’s crazy how the small things brighten your days.
Over the years, I’ve collected little pieces and hung them on my walls for decoration. It was mostly leftover bits of scrap that I managed to use, creating something else entirely. Flowers, stars, even a moon sculpture made from old newspapers and cardboard. You could do whatever you wanted, if you put your mind to it.
These little creative musings made my ‘home’ seem a lot less depressing, anyway.
Silco had given me many freedoms, though, so I can’t complain about that. He gave me perhaps more freedom than any other crime-lord would give one of his servants. It could be a lot worse, I knew that. I think he pitied me a little, when he took me from my father. I say took, so not to remind myself that my father sold me. I try my best to forget that little fact.
When I came here, I had nothing but the clothes on my back. No possessions, no photographs, nothing to suggest I’d had a life before this. Perfect, in Silco’s eyes. Nobody would ever come searching for me, nor would anyone fight for my freedom. I was a nobody.
He treated me fairly, considering… well, considering the violence he’s known for. For starters, he didn’t force me to work in the brothel, nor did he send me to the pits—the violent underground fighting establishment that many of his men frequent, betting on those unlucky enough to work there. Silco gave me his bar to run, his people to entertain. A few errands to run here and there. He even paid me a few coins every week for my efforts. Not much, but enough to pay for food and necessities.
It was easy really, just do what he asks and remain loyal to him, which of course I did. Through fear or loyalty, I wasn’t sure. Perhaps both? I’ve seen too many of Silco’s victims to even think about double-crossing him.
I did try to leave once. A long time ago now. I was eighteen, foolishly believing I’d get away with it, that I’d slip under his radar. The idea of freedom lured me from his grips and I chased it, eagerly, desperately, trying to get away from the life I was sold into. I left with a girl I knew from the lanes, Ren. She was my only friend.
But we didn’t even make it to the bridge before being dragged back here, forced to watch as my friend was being beaten to a pulp. They needed me, you see. Needed to maintain appearances, so I got away with only a few bruises. I was locked in my room for a whole month on my own after that little escapade.
When they finally let me out, she’d gone, vanished. They refused to tell me anything, but I never saw my friend again. And I’ve been alone ever since, each night a torment. It was what, nearly ten years ago now? But the thought of her still haunts me even now. The guilt gnawed at me. It was my fault she’d gone, after all.
“No.” I scold myself. Stop thinking about that.
I grip my face in frustration, trying to clear my mind as the nightmares haunt me. I run my fingers through my hair, braiding it absentmindedly as I dried myself off from the shower. I throw my towel over the door and collapse into bed, hiding myself under the covers.
I wrap one arm around myself, slowly rocking from side to side. My other hand cups my cheek softly stroking it for comfort. The loneliness was easier to ignore when I was busy working, surrounded by people. But at night, when I was tucked away in my room, hidden away from the world—that was a different matter. The hollow emptiness inside me was haunting, deafening in such a small, quiet space.
My mind fell upon Sevika. I thought of how soft she felt against my skin, her kisses so tender and loving. I couldn’t remember the last time someone had touched me like that. I probably shouldn’t find myself wanting her, craving her—not after knowing what she’s like. But I found myself hungry for her touch. I couldn’t help but feel there’s more to her, a softer side perhaps. That’s the side of her I cling to, the side of her I never expected was there.
What had I expected? I wasn’t sure. But I don’t think I’d expected such softness from someone with a hard exterior, someone who was usually anything but gentle. She wasn’t known for being soft, after all. I traced the places she’d kissed me, imagining her there once more. A soft moan left me as my fingers lowered beneath the covers, finding my clit.
I played with myself, imagining it was her fingers instead of mine. I replayed the memories of her over and over in my mind. Good girl, she praised. Cum for me.
It wasn’t long until I did, falling soundly asleep to the thought of the woman I both loathed and desired so desperately.
✧˖*°✧*°࿐
My dreams seemed to be haunted by her; her face, her touch, her kiss. I woke to the sound of my soft moans as I played with myself in my sleep, the memories of her clearly still at the front of my mind.
I heard a soft chuckle, I froze. My eyes flicked open and I realised that I wasn’t alone. Sevika was lying next to me, watching me closely with a smirk. I inched backwards in shock.
“Shit,” I mutter, almost horrified at the intrusion. I was naked, again, and she was fully clothed. What I’d do to see her naked, I thought, pulling the sheets up to my chin.
“Don’t stop on my account,” she muttered, biting her lip and watched me closely. “Carry on.”
I looked away from her, blushing furiously.
“I said, carry on,” she warned, her voice was dark and commanding. She gripped my face and kissed me.
Slowly, I continue, circling my clit and eliciting soft whimpers. I turn my head to look away, her eyes were piercing. She held onto my face, forcing me to look at her.
“I want to see you finish,” she whispered.
My blush deepened, but I continued to play with myself while she watched me. I couldn’t help but close my eyes as I felt the orgasm building. She slapped me hard on the cheek, my eyes flew open as I hissed in pain.
“Eyes on me, princess.” She smirked, pulling the sheets down and playing with my breasts carelessly.
It was hard to keep my eyes open. It felt almost desperate. I recalled last night and how she fucked me. My orgasm nearly reached, but I moaned softly, “Please, can I cum?”
“Good girl.” She smiled, “You’re a fast learner.”
I floated somewhere between ecstasy and obedience, excitement twisting inside me at the praise she was giving me.
“Please,” I beg, not sure if I can hold it back much longer.
“Cum for me,” she growled, nibbling my ear. Her words were enough. I felt my walls crashing down as I came for her, moaning her name softly.  
Her eyes were fixed on me almost admiringly as I lay there, breathing deeply. She stroked my hair softly, twirling it beneath her fingers as if lost in thought.
The slight embarrassment of what just happened washed over me. Had I really been playing with myself in my sleep? And she was there, watching, all the while. If you could die of shame, I’d be a goner, I thought, pulling back the sheets and looking away. Was I really going to give in to her, every time?
…probably.
“I need a shower,” I mutter, sitting up.
“Not so fast.” She pulls me back down by my hair, “I’ll see to it.”
She smirked, disappearing under the sheets. I pull myself up a little bit to make room for her, but she pulled my legs down at once, spreading them apart for her benefit. I could feel her breath tickling my skin before she kissed me there… everywhere. She pushed her face into me, licking, sucking, eating the evidence of my orgasm. The sensations built inside me again alongside the excitement. She spread my lips and sucked my clit, swirling her tongue around. The sensitivity overwhelmed me. My back arched. Fuck, fuck, I mutter. She slipped fingers inside me and started fucking me. I inhaled sharply, softly groaning in pleasure.
I was like putty in her hands, every single time. She made me melt, my defences disappearing anytime she was near. My breath hitching as she fucked me hard and I could feel myself building again.
“Cum again, if you can, princess.”
Her dark, smooth voice was enough. I reached my climax for the second time. And she devoured me, the taste sweet on her tongue. She leaned up, pulling her fingers out of me, dripping and sliding them into her mouth as I watched. I felt shy all of a sudden, looking away.
She pushed her fingers back inside me and I gasped, not expecting it. She pulled out and forced them into my mouth. Shocked, I try to pull away, but she pushes them further into my mouth until I gag.
“Suck,” she says, staring at me from above.
I oblige, sucking her fingers clean.
“That’s my girl.” She smirks, pushing them far into my mouth until I gag once more, then pulled out laughing. She sits next to me, kissing me on the head and wrapping her arm around me.
“I think I’m addicted.” She said as my head fell onto her, curling into her body.
“To what?” I laughed softly as I snuggled into her.
“You,” she laughed. “You’ve got me cunt-struck.”
I roll my eyes, nudging her.
“Don’t let the compliment go to your head, though.”
“I wouldn’t say cunt-struck is even among the top ten compliments I’ve ever received,” I say softly, “Though I do like the nickname you’ve given me.”
“Yeah?” she said, “And what’s that?”
“You call me princess quite a lot,” I said quietly, arm around her as we lay there. “It’s nice.”
 “Only because you’ve got long golden hair and you’re stuck living in this tower like Rapunzel.” She laughed darkly, sitting up.
I froze, a tight knot forming in my stomach at her words and lack of warmth as she pulled away from me. She stood, walking towards the door and hovering there slightly.
“Silco sent me, he wants a word.” She slammed the door behind her without a second glance, leaving me suffering from whiplash with her being so hot-and-cold.
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itsjustmebluesilly · 3 days ago
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Linked Universe: Daycare AU :)
Time and malon work at a daycare together!
Mal works at the daycare, time was a war vet who was always miserable, Mal forced him to go to her job and he immediately fell in love with the kiddos lmao uhhh here loredump on the chain children
Kiddies:
Wild (Cub) 6 - Wild is around 6 years old, and is best friends with Hyrule. He tends to put a lot of toys and such in his mouth, and the reason why there’s so many child locks and why he has a special sink to clean the stuff he puts his mouth on. Wild loves exploring with Hyrule and somehow the two keep breaking out of the building to explore. Wild also likes helping Malon prepare the snacks, and is very restless during naptime, unless he has his favorite plush.
Twilight (Pup) 7 - Wild’s older brother (by 1 year), he’s absolutely obsessed with farm animals and takes care of the daycare's pet. (dunno if i want it to be a hamster or a dog/cat), he likes playing pretend with his younger brother. Twilight is a little animalistic like his brother, and like the rest of the little chain, playing pretend. Twi and Sky bond over the love of animals, and they tend to talk a lot about them. Twilight is also very protective of his little brother, and can and will get into fights if provoked.
Wind (Guppy) 4½ - Wind has an older brother (Wars) that’s in like, in 5-6th grade, and talks about him a lot. Wind absolutely loves when they take trips to the aquarium. He’s extremely energetic, and a bit of a handful sometimes. He always talks about how he wants to grow up and be a pirate, despite pirates…not really existing anymore?? He plays in the rain when it’s raining outside, and always seems to forget to put a coat on when he does. Loves boats and trains.
Hyrule (Rule) 6 - Hyrule is very sweet and always tries to help everyone. He usually sticks with Wild, and the two of them explore almost every day, trying to learn something new. He collects as many rupees that he finds randomly on walks and such to save up for new toys to bring in. He likes fantasy books and reads about myths and legends a lot. He is, however, scared of blood.
Legend (Bunny) 7 - Legend is a bit of a bully, and tries his best to act aloof. (He’s terrible at it.) He tends to always bring in something new every day, though they always seem to have the same brand… (With a certain purple bunny.) Despite trying to be independent, the rest of the chain always ends up roping him into the games they play and such.
Four (Mini) 8 - Four is actually one of quadruplets (Shadow is adopted,) though their parents decided it would be best for the kids to have separate daycares because the last time they were all in one, well-. Four is always building something, whether it may be buildings out of legos for a game the chain is playing, to an arts and crafts thing that Malon printed instructions for. Four is actually the oldest (besides Wars because he’s not really in here-) of the chain, but yet he’s also the shortest. Four ends up fixing the toys that Wild breaks, though he asks Legend for help when Wild accidentally rips a plushie.
Sky (Bird) 5½ - Sky is very sweet, though he sleeps a lot of the time. He’s not as outspoken as the rest of them, though he does hang out with Twilight a lot. Sky sits by the windows a lot and daydreams, and he always brings a blanket with him. (It has the pattern of the sailcloth.) Sky loves birds, and he also has an imaginary friend (Fi.) Sky’s favorite time in daycare is naptime, where Time usually reads some sort of story to get the boys to sleep. Malon tends to find Sky asleep in Time’s lap, and has a small laugh seeing her husband asleep too.
That's all, the idea came to me some random morning and I couldn't stop thinking about it. I don't work in a daycare (though I used to go to one) so I'm partially basing that experience for this. Apologies if it's not really that good, I didn't feel very confident posting this either but eh. I might make a sub blog for this, if people want it. In fact...
anyway yeah, please correct me on any info that might be wrong. I don't really have a good grasp on some of their personalities, I'm trying my best here ok-
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ninyard · 11 months ago
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I would love to just sit on a roof top and talk to you about anything and everything. Hear all of your opinions on everything.
Wait what the hell that’s so sweet I’m the mayor of yapsville when you get me started on something I have An Opinion on, so I promise you’d probably quickly regret it.
But picture us. Me and you on a roof. And I tell you the following, as the wind blows our hair and the sun starts to set:
- Andrew helps Renee dye her hair
- When they move in together, Andrew always finds his t-shirts or random belongings shoved under Neil’s pillow. Harmless stuff, but usually stuff that belongs to Andrew. Kept safe, untouchable below his pillow like the few belongings he had in the beginning.
- Dyslexic Kevin Day
- Allison helps Neil get his hair back into a good condition when he starts to grow it out post-TKM. She helps him do treatments and recommends the best products. She braids it when it gets long enough. She shows him how to properly tie it back, she teaches him how to properly look after the texture in his hair.
- Andrew has a folder in his camera roll for nobody else but himself of things that make him smile on the inside. Most of the time it’s stupid things, like a terrible advertisement stuck to a lamp post, or an ugly dog, or an awfully parked car. Silly things that make him laugh that he screenshots or snaps a picture of. There’s eventually hundreds of pictures in there. There’s photos of Neil, when he falls asleep on Andrew’s shoulder and Andrew’s too proud to tell him how cute he looked. Photos of Neil in his suit before a banquet, photos of him doing dishes or handing him dinner. There’s photos of Andrew and Renee after they’ve been sparring. There’s photos of things he’s seen in stores that remind him of Kevin, or Neil, or Renee. Sometimes Aaron. There’s even a few photos of Kevin in there, too. Nobody know this folder exists. Not even Neil, who doesn’t even know half of the photos of himself in there even exist. Because it’s just for Andrew. It’s just for him to collect the little joys in his life now that he can somewhat actually feel it.
- Kevin has to wear a brace on his hand/wrist every now and again, and he still sees a physiotherapist once every few months to check up on his hand.
- Matt goes to Andrew the first time he thinks about relapsing. He doesn’t even think about it. Neil is very confused when he comes back to the dorm to find Matt and Andrew playing video games together, but doesn’t question it.
- Dan tags along to night practice every now and again. Nobody acknowledges that she isn’t usually there, they just let her join them on the court and practice as usual. It makes Kevin really happy, actually, to see her trying to better her skills with them. Usually she just joins them when she can’t sleep and needs to get out of her head.
- On the OG foxes last night together before the first of them graduate, they all find themselves around a fire pit in one of their parents houses, or on property Allison rented out, and they tell each other stories and share some confessions in a mostly-funny, kind of emotional way. They cry and laugh and hug and shock each other with some of the things they say but it’s a really beautiful moment before they’re finally split up for the first time
- Dyslexic Kevin Day (again)
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goldenpinof · 2 years ago
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why? bc i was thinking about what i watch and what i'd like to see from dan, basically what you said to the previous anon. in late 2018 (at the end of the dan and phil era coincidentally) my taste shifted a lot from mostly comedy and vloggers to video essays and comentary so personally i'd love to see something like that from dan, but i have no idea what dan wants to do. what do you think he wants to do? what's something he'll find fulfilling and sustainable?
i'm going insane reading all these asks about what's next for dan's career. i lobe him i want him to succeed, i want him to get attention and i want to be entertained by him <3
me 🤝 you
sustainable? this is UNSUSTAINABLE!! (sorry, the last promo got in the eyes).
i think he wants (or wanted before wad) to get into stand-up comedy. at some point he proclaimed himself a comedian and started acting like one. unsuccessfully, in my opinion. he is a bad actor, but he is good at exaggerating his feelings. and this is why wad show worked for those who were familiar with Dan, his content, his internet personality and the phandom. i think he loves attention from real life audience, and he loves connecting to the audience while being on stage, so audience participation is an important part of what he wants. (let's count how many times i say "audience"). a not-so-strict script that allows to ask questions, react to answers, comment on people's reactions, make faces, laugh randomly, adjust the show to what is happening on stage – that's a stand-up show that hundreds of people are doing. and i think Dan would be very fucking good at it. the problem is the theme of said stand-up. and i think Dan would love for it to not rely on youtube as heavily as it did during wad (which wasn't an actual stand-up comedy).
remember the last vidcon he attended and the panel that felt like a Ted Talk? it was a fail, i'd say. partly because the audience was too diverse in a sense that phannies weren't the majority. and i'm glad he didn't push this type of career path. wad was so much better, but it was also targeted at the people who already knew him. even if in the beginning i think he was trying to get a wider audience, the lack of funding or enthusiasm promo-wise made it impossible for the "outsiders" to make the experience strange for everyone, Dan including. wad happened to be for us. but was it successful or fulfilling, or sustainable? no. not in a money / audience growth / similar future tours ways. there should be done a lot of changes. and i guess completely changing his management was the 1st and very important step. it was fulfilling in a way that he met us, he saw what his coming out did and what an incredible impact he had on us (not to mention that ii was almost the same. a bunch of gays gathered together).
he clearly wants something bigger than we aka phandom can give him. and for that he must change the theme or/and concept of his shows. i do think that he will try to do a performance again. and i hope it's gonna be less acting and more improvisation.
i'm not sure about a filmed show. he sucks as an actor, and i don't want him to fail :( but if Joey Graceffa successfully put out Escape the Night and Liza Koshy had a series that didn't require more acting than her own skits, maybe something similar could be alright?! "danisnotokay" is an outdated title though. we need to change it, he is not 25 anymore, come on.
basically, he loves attention, complaining about his life, trauma dumping, edgy jokes, screaming, laughing, sex jokes, feeling liked, loved and wanted. he fucking beams when people applaud him. and for that he needs audience. he could get all of it minus an applause with a podcast or livestreams, but he is a stubborn asshole, so i do hope to see him on stage again. preferably a smaller one and with new topics to discuss.
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freakalot · 3 months ago
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gojo hates condoms ☆
not even in an ‘i can’t feel a thing’ frat-fuck way either. he just wants to be close to you. he’s touch starved as it is and being inside of you is quite literally the closet he can be to you. why would he want a barrier between his achy length and your silken walls?
he hates condoms. hates them like they’re pointing south on his moral compass. hates them like they hurt to use—which they do, in a way—the mental anguish feels real to him, at least. he picks up a fuss in the grocery store when you pull a pack of ribbed condoms from the shelf to try because why would you seek pleasure from artificial ridges when the protruding veins of his cock would feel just as good if not dressed in a condom?
sometimes he eats you out for twice as long as usual to get you really fucked out and dumb. he’ll make you cum hard and fast and so much that your mind is a mess in the hopes that you’ll forget all about your safety precautions and let him feel you from the inside out. but you always catch on. with a tsk and a finger pointed to the draw where he keeps the horrid things out of sight.
so when you let him fuck you raw for the first time, gojo is reeling. it’s on the condition that he promises to pull out, and promise he does—with a pinky finger hooked around yours and his lips to his thumb—he promises to pull out.
he decides on missionary, because as much as he loves the hundred different positions he knows how to wrangle you into, he wants to connect with you. to make love, not fuck.
and even your wetness against his tip is enough to jolt his stomach downwards. collecting your glossing over his angry head as he rubs himself up and down your folds—he would cum just like this if he wasn’t so stuck on feeling all of you. you’re warm and wet and tight as he pushes against your entrance and oh god he’s going to cum already.
“oh,” he stills, eyes deadset on yours as he slides into you. his tip is rubbing against that spot that makes your back arch upwards and it takes everything in you not to laugh at the distraught look on his face as he says “i have to pull out.”
“you’re joking, right?”
“i really wish i was baby,” he looks pained. he’s never felt something so heavenly and ungodly at the same time. he wants to do bad things, to fuck you into the mattress and breed you full of himself until you’re too weak to care about the aftermath of such recklessness. “i can’t pull out.”
“what?” you laugh, his balls tighten at the sound.
“if i move—” satoru has never looked so serious, “—i will cum. this was a bad idea. why would you let me do this?”
“you’re the one always—”
“actually don’t argue with me, you know what it does to me.” he squeezes his eyes shut and focuses on anything other then the way you feel around him. he does math in his head, thinks about the people he’s killed, how much he loves you… how pretty you look right now… growing old with you.
“i swear you’re getting harder inside of—”
“imsorryiloveyoubutpleasebequietorelseyouaregoingtogetpregnant.”
it takes him a minute of mental gymnastics to feel confident enough to start slowly sliding out of you, but all hope dies when the heel of your foot presses against his ass and with a smile made of sin you pull him deeper inside of you.
he opens his mouth to protest, to tell you he is not joking and all that comes out is a beautiful strangled moan that makes you tighten around him. for a man who claims to be the strongest he is rather weak-willed when it comes to your pussy. he needs to cum so hard that it hurts, but a fear of maybe ruining your life and relationship digs his teeth into his bottom lip.
“don’t do this to me,” he whines.
but you’re smiling. you’re so tight and wet and beautiful and everything he’s ever dreamt of having and holding and you’re smiling. “satoru,” you say, and he’s weak. “cum inside.”
anything for you. it’s gorgeous: the way he lets loose, falling forward to press all his weight into you as he groans and his balls release in hot spurts that you can feel painting your insides white. it’s the connection, the intimacy, the tears that prick at his eyes.
and he doesn’t pull out. no, he presses his hips forward to fuck his cum as deep into you as he possibly can and he vows to throw out every condom in the goddamn house.
god he hates condoms.
part 2
24K notes · View notes
tonycries · 8 months ago
Text
I-T G-I-R-L!
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Synopsis. Making big, powerful boys break beg and follow your every whim? Easy!
Pairings. [SEPARATE] Gojo x Reader, Sukuna x Reader, Choso x Reader, Geto x Reader, Nanami x Reader, Toji x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem! reader, NÉEDY boys, making them whine, bondagé, creampíes, GOJO’S POWERS, chokíng Geto, use of “good boy”, cúmplay, spítting, making them CRY, MAJOR overstím, bégging (THEM), pússy-slappíng, oraI (fem receiving), face-ríding, matíng presses, dry húmping, overspill, pet names, swearing.
Word count. 5.9k (whew)
A/N. Woke up n’ decided I wanna bully them so here we are. Have a lovely day <3
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♡ TOJI FUSHIGURO - MR. AND MRS.
“P-please.”
“What was that?”
“Fuck you-”
It was low - begging - and for the first time, you have that syrupy sweet privilege of hearing Toji’s husky baritone break with such a whiny crack at the end. 
Smugly, you swipe an index right across where your puffy pussy was straddling his poor, overworked cock. Collecting the saturated mess along his furious length - still so swollen with the sheer volume he’d been gushing out tonight. All the way up, up, up to that messy puddle of seed glistening all over his flinching abs. “Then…I guess m’not letting you cum inside, Toji. Again.”
“No! No no no- oh.” Toji’s burst of pained moans are cut off when you shove your fingers between his bruised lips. Dewy, green eyes rolling to the back of his head with each suck and slurp at their milky white sheen. “Fuck- you little-” And despite how furious he sounds, you could feel the very tip of his fat head thicken, twitching a jagged pattern along your cervix. With a low growl, Toji narrows his gaze, biting down on your now-clean digits with his sharp canines, “I said- please, my girl.”
Just that simple plea has your boyfriend’s jaw clenching, teeth gritted so viciously at the way you’ve been oh-so-coyly denying him the one thing he’s wanted for what feels like hours now. 
“Louder.” your lips curl into a devilish grin, back arching in that perfect bow Toji loved so much. Only deepening the lingering rolls of your hips down his needy tip. “Didn’t hear ya.”
“F-fuck.” Toji’s throwing his head back, thick fingers coming down to splay out across your bent thighs. “Can you- please-” You could feel every minute flex of his muscled thighs when he efforts to buck your sloppy hips deeper - faster - down his fat cock. Only to be halted by ten mean fingernails of yours pinning him down by his curving pecs, “-please. Wan’ cum inside- let me cum inside goddammit, woman.”
Of course, you decide to tease him by slowing down your pace even more. Letting your sloppy pussy just stroll down every greedy inch of his dick. Trying to hold back your content giggle, “I dunno…”
And Toji thinks he could yell out in frustration, he thinks he could sob, “Fuck- I said please. Pretty please? What more do you fucking want?”
He sounded so devastated. And you swear you could spy wet, bulbous tears at the corners of his long lashes, the familiar scar along his lips wobbling with such precious need. 
“Hmm–” you’re letting out such a sultry drag of your voice, taking so much of your sweet sweet time that Toji thinks he’s about to lose his mind. About to just flip your bratty self over and shove his thoroughly teased cock into you until you forget about that looming threat of not letting him paint your insides white. Fuck, the things he does for you-
“Call me your wife.”
Shit - Toji’s darkened eyes widen at your little request, jaw hanging open in disbelief and-
“That’s it?” he laughs - laughs. Rumbling out of his broad chest in a hoarse rasp, and those two strong arms of his tug down your limp body to kiss teasingly at your jutted-out lips. Slipping his hot tongue between the seams, “S’all because my hah- baby wanted to be my- my pretty lil’ wife. Well-” Any and every retort is fucked out of your mind when Toji’s spearheading into your mushy g-spot with a harsh rut of his hips. “-what my wife wants, my wife gets.”
The bed is creaking with every riotous slam, smearing the velvety pool of cum even farther between your bodies. Sticking to you like a sloppy second skin, strings of lewd juices form and snap when his massive cock stretches your gummy walls until they gape. 
“Shit- shit shit shit, if I knew that was all you wanted-” you’re feeling the languid drag of Toji’s happy trail scratch your throbbing clit. “Please- I would’ve been fucking my wife for s-so long now. Silly girl, s’all I’ve ever wanted- would’ve begged, gotten on my knees-”
“Hngh! Fuck-” you’re squealing when you feel him drip with even more saturated precum to coat your snug channel. One calloused palm of his coming between the two of your slick bodies to smear across the mess from his sweet highs, deftly angling them so that the rounded tips of his fingers are stuffing your leaky pussy with sloppy globs of his seed every time you’re slamming down. 
“Now now–”  It’s all you can do to gulp in heaving breaths to make your tone sound warning, but even that sounds too breathless - and both of you know it. Babbling away, “-don’t get so cocky- might just- hah, change my mind, husband.”
And fuck. Oh fuck. 
Your poor cunt just throbs when in a split-second, Toji’s mouth slacks even further, wrenching out a guttural groan. 
And then your gushing walls are milking out every ribbon of velvety cum that splurges into your tight pussy. It’s so much - too much, painting your insides all white with his seed. Toji’s gasping at the feeling of it sloshing around your elastic walls in slow, clingy swivels coating the both of you. 
His breath hitches when he spies down at the obscenely white mess below, globs of his cum slobbering messily down your inner thigh. Fuck, he’s never - never - came before you. This was-
“This better be a proposal, y’know.” you hum in amusement. “Or it would be interesting that you came early just becaus-”
“The fuck else would it be?” Toji’s gruffing out, two warm hands gliding to grip onto the globes of your ass. Still irritated. Still embarrassed. 
Ignoring your titter, he rams your teasing hips down with a sharp smack! like he was branding all five fingers onto your skin. Plugging your ravaged entrance shut with his weepy dick to stop even more of that thick, gushing cum from trickling out. You mewl when you feel his swelteringly wet tip quirk at the very bottom of your spongy cervix in interest, “Now be quiet and let me fuck you properly as my wife.”
♡ NANAMI KENTO - Hands-on intervention…
“You really are trying to get us fired, huh, my love?” he’s murmuring gently, “What do you think you’re doing this late, hm?”
Now, Nanami knew he shouldn’t have taken on those extra documents, he knew he should’ve been back home by now. Wrapped up in you and your cute gossip about what happened in your department today.
But here he was, sitting at his empty office. With you - stubborn as you are - straddling him like such a slut on top of his heavily manspread, muscular thighs, his favorite late-night snack. His coworker. His wife. 
“I should hah- ask you the same thing, Ken.” you’re grinning, the sinfully tight satin of your skirt hiking up with each slow, teasing roll of your drooly cunt against his clothed erection. It’s so messy. Your syrupy saturated slick mixing in with Nanami’s steadily beading precum. “Didn’t we both agree to no more late nights?”
He’s heaving out a shaky sigh, running a warm hand up and down your arched spine, “I know, I know. I apologize.”
That frantically achy little pulse of your slick-glossed cunt on top of him told him that he wasn’t forgiven just yet. And Nanami gulps - loosening that yellow, speckled tie of his with the tight bobbing of his Adam’s apple. Rich tone shaky - shuddering, even, “How- how do you want me to make it up to you, darling?”
You’re batting your lashes at his expansive mahogany desk. “Well…”
Of course he should’ve seen where this was going - with your high-heel-clad feet swiveling high in the air, digging into his broad shoulders. Stitches in your poor skirt popping and tearing with each bullying thrust your husband’s planting on your ravaged in this tight mating press. 
“K-Ken—” you’re letting out such a sickly sweet moan when his fat, weepy tip collides with the very bullseye of your sensitive g-spot. Your fingers work deftly to reach into your skirt pocket - pulling out that familiar tiny hot-pink bullet vibrator.
“Walkin’ around with that during work?” Nanami gasps, barely tearing his eyes away from that heavenly sight of your swollen pussy entrance wrapped around his girthy shaft. “Such a dirty girl you-” 
“Oh s’not for me.” 
And fuck, Nanami can only watch - can only gape his clenched jaw open when your devious fingers dip the feverishly shaky vibrator down, down, down to kiss so delicately at his thick hilt. 
“Oh!” His towering body wracks with a shiver, full, heavy balls clenching so tightly. Hammering his rawly aching cock so thoroughly into you, hips pistoning forwards with the carnal need for more more more- “Wait- Fuck! M-my love?”
“Yes–?” you’re humming, low and sultry and oh Nanami already knows he’s gone. He can only pray he leaves with his sanity intact. 
Splaying out two large hands on the sides of your head, the documents on top rustle in sync with those saturatedly hypnotic squelches echoing from your ravishing cunt. “Is this- s’this oh, fuck- please.” Nanami screws his eyes shut when you’re holding down the device even harder onto his glistening shaft. “S’this- is it- because I broke our hah- promise?”
“Maybe.” you’re breathing out into his panting mouth. So enveloped by his weighty figure that it was almost difficult to work your little magic. “Maybe I just got tired of waitin’ around for you to finish overtime, Ken.”
“Please!”
Over and over. That tiny spark is enough to have him barrelling back into your dripping wetness with reckless abandon. 
He’s so utterly ruined - glasses sliding down his high nose-bridge, thighs quivering with sensitive need. And you could just feel every fresh wave of heated precum painting your cunt in a glossy new coat. “Fuck- tell me please. Please, darling, m’begging.”
“Promise me no more overtime.” You’re grinning, fingers still steady tracing his most sensitive spots. 
“P-promise…”
“N’ to always hurry home to me?”
“I promise! I promise- promise to always come home- to you- always. Please-” he’s startling you with a soft pad of his thumb rolling over your neglected clit. Such a low, broken keen leaving him at when you start drawing harsh, methodical circles on the sensitive spots along his length. “N-no more overtime. Please please please- feels too good- what do I do- what-”
Ah, success looked so pretty.
Nanami’s eyes were already so watery, stern lips trembling with little apologies about “never workin’ overtime again.” So uncharacteristically disheveled in a way that makes your mouth water.
“Shit-” you hiss when that pointed nub of the vibrator accidentally hits your widely stretched-out pussy. The velvety cling of your walls making him hiss furiously. Disrupting, fat tip nudging all those crevices along your snug channel. “Hah- don’t think I’d let you off so-”
Before you can react, he’s hiking a long leg up on the desk to angle his crashes with scary accuracy. Just colliding against your bulbous g-spot with no hesitation. Pushing, with the very edge of his weepy tip - far, so far that you could scream.
Over and over and over- So elastically stretching out your snug hole to your limits to take him in all his long, throbbing entirety. 
“Fuck- fuck fuck I know, I know.” He’s alternating between long, rough strokes to shove you further and further up the cool desk, and shallow lingering grinds to mold your pretty walls to the exact form of his swollen shaft. “I’ll do anything- anything, please just- cum.”
It only takes a few more calculated pistons of his hips, and a touchy, teasing smack! onto your weepy cunt before you’re crashing headfirst into your orgasm. Cumming all around his wildly twitching shaft, your velvety walls just mending all around the shape of his pretty cock. Your toes curl, back arching into such a bowing bend. And in the split-second your grip weakens, Nanami’s seizing that hot pink devil in your hand.
“F-fuck wait-” you squeal at at familiar bzzzt-bzzzt-bzzzt echoing across the filled-out walls of your cunt. Squeezing inside the tight fit where Nanami’s fat shaft was nestling, tremoring so deliciously against each and every one of your sweet spots. Stuffing you full. “What-”
“Don’t forget - you’re working overtime, too, my love.”
♡ GETO SUGURU - No need for air
“F-fuuuck, gorgeous.” Geto’s melodic moan makes your cunt throb, a fresh gush of your sweet sweet juices slobbering down to where he was slapping your puffed-up clit with his fat head. The angry divot of his tip smacking up once, twice onto the too-sensitive nub. 
“So fuckin’ wet f’me-” he whispers from behind, gliding a thumb across the glossy sheen trickling down from the corners of your slit. The sight of his glistening fingers makes him bare you with such a crazed, feral grin, feeding you inch by fucking in languid, bullying rams. “-almost makes me forget the hand around my throat.”
At this, your nails are digging in even deeper around the pale, long column of his throat. Leaving neat, red indents that stand out. And you swear you could spy his leering grin grow even wider at that sinful sting. 
“What about it, Sugu?” you’re grinning over your shoulder. Gasping for air at how relentlessly he was trying to squeeze his fat shaft through that tight, glossy ring of muscle. 
Each drag of his throbbing shaft has your fingers tightening more around his throat. Making Geto feel so woozy and lightheaded with each little grind into the glistening channel past your puffy folds. “Heh, really like fuck- it rough like this, huh?” A low groan drags at the back of his throat when you start pushing your limp hips back in a jerky little cadence to try and meet his. “Shit- shit shit shit s’too good. You’re suckin’ me up so tight s’almost hard to fuck into ya. Almost makes me wanna-”
“Cum inside?” 
This earns you a punishing smack! on your bulging cunt, cool metallic rings of his burning into your skin. So sopping wet and struggling to expand your gummy walls around his expanding girth. Drawing out a dark chuckle from the depths of his chest, “Real funny, gorgeous. You and I both hah- know s’jus’ your hngh! cockdrunk mind talking.”
“Nooo—” you’re tugging him in a desperate, vice-like grip to crash your lips against his. Whining against his lips, “S’not. Really really want you to cum inside, Sugu. F’me - please? Like a good boy?” 
It was a little slip of your tongue - really - and you didn’t expect anything more than another teasing slap to your cunt, maybe even a joke at your expense.
But what you didn’t expect was for the sloppy cadence of Geto’s hips to falter just a bit. You’re turning your head just in time to catch that glassy, far-away look in his eyes, jaw slacking open to let out a shocked gasp. You hear a sharp pop! from his toned hips before they’re surging forwards to barrel your poor cunt with every weighty inch of his girth. 
Over- and over and over- One large hand of his is catching around yours to squeeze - warningly. Letting out a strangled, “G-gorgeous…”
Oh? 
Brows quirking, you’re batting your lashes so syrupy slow, “Are you gonna be my good boy, Sugu? Make me a momma?”
Another lewd push and pull, having you bouncing back on Geto’s sharp hipbones with such loud smacks! of skin-on-skin. Ringing into the humid, heady air and wracking his body with almost-painful shivers. 
“F-fuck–” He’s struggling to find the words - to even think with his melty mess of a mind. Such a delicate blush burns at Geto’s scowling cheeks when you’re facing him with a surprised grin - one he hides by latching his lips onto the crook of your neck, hiding away the smile threatening at his plump lips. “God- you’re gonna be the death of me. Don’t you fuckin-”
Your firm grip grows even firmer, resolving to him choking in large, breathy exhales. “Good boy.” Craning your arm around deftly to cup his pretty cheek. “You’re gonna do what I say, right?”
Shit, he was a goner.
It has the same effect, and once again, your big bad boyfriend is reduced back into a whiny mess. He’s planting two strong legs on the drenched silken sheets to fully fuck his bullying cock all the way into the back of your plushy pussy. 
Usually sharp tongue so heavy and slurring. Babbling out little pleas into the rhymically jiggling valley of your breasts - “Ohhh yes- yes yes yes please let me- wanna- m’your good boy, right? Let me cum inside, hngh shit! Wan’ you to take it- ah- a-all, make you a momma.” 
He lets out wet, feverish pants when you drag him close enough to moan that dangerous little word into his mouth. “Please? Please let me?” Geto nuzzles his cheek into your soft palm, heady movements so slow. Syrupy - like he was moving through molasses. And it’s like he doesn’t even realize what he’s doing when he’s popping one of your fingers into his mouth. Delicate pink lips looking so pretty - depraved - wrapped around your ring finger. “Wanna knock you up- hah marry you.” His eyes roll to the back of his head, “Put a ring on this finger- n’ a baby in ya pretty pussy.”
Meeting that increasingly ruthless cadence by fucking back to memorize each thumping ridge, each prominent vein along his girthy shaft. Twitching. Angry. He’s nodding - nodding so feverishly - tears crinkling glisteningly at the corners of his lids. “Please- please call me that again. Let me make you a momma, please.”
You don’t get to hear the rest of his sentence, because it only takes a few more solid, thorough swallows of his rummaging cock before he’s speechless. So fucking pussydrunk he can’t piece together anything but your name followed by a slurred-out string of profanities. Close. Too close. 
Staring into Geto’s heavy, half-lidded gaze, you whisper such a saccharine sweet, “Then, cum inside f’me like a good boy, Sugu.”
♡ CHOSO KAMO - “Crybaby.”
It’s by the second orgasm that Choso feels a bit jittery, thighs quivering uncontrollably, chest heaving up and down in pained, ragged little gasps. 
It’s by the fourth that Choso feels nervous, he trusts you - of course, he does, you’re his sweet girl after all - and yet he can’t help that churning heat in his pulse. Heavy balls squeezing weakly with each glide of your soft palm down his red, achingly stimulated length. 
It’s only by the fifth that Choso is sobbing, big fat tears trailing down to his glossy lips. Such a rosy red and bitten in worry, hips fucking up in jagged, mindless little grinds. Oh, it takes everything in Choso to not cling on desperately to your feverish hand right now - dwarfed by his sheer girth, so glossy with a thick sheen of precum - yet still dragging up and down relentlessly. Treating him like some toy. 
“Baby–” your beloved boyfriend’s wet gasp catches in his throat when you swivel a curious thumb underneath his sensitive slit. Letting a fresh gush of his saturated precum glisten down to your wrist. “Baby baby baby- please. P-please, I don’t think I can- ngh- give y’anymore.”
“I think you can.” your leveled hum cuts through his frantic pleas. “Don’t you think? After all, you were so happy getting off to my panties like this, weren’t you? Ruining them?”
It’s like the very memory of his shameful act has Choso fucking his jerky hips up into your soft touch, arching his muscled back into a beautiful curve on your soaked bedsheets. Oh, how embarrassed he felt - how shameful, being caught in the very act by you, fingers deep in your panty drawer. 
Despite his very obvious need, he’s shaking his barely-lucid head. Damp, dark tresses sticking to his sweat-glossed forehead, curtaining those glassy eyes. Slurring out, “Fuck! Please m’sorry m’sorry I don’t think- can’t-”
So deceivingly innocently, you’re batting your lashes in a way that has his massive girth jolting ferally in your hand, “But that’s all I really want, Cho~?”
“...”
Leaning down, Choso could feel your mean smirk against his hotly flushed skin. Dragging up his salty trail of tears, kissing so gently meanwhile your next words made him think he’d pass out. Sultry, and whispered right against the shell of his ear, “Then we better make this last one count, right?”
“Ah!” he’s yelping, large hands scrambling for the sheets - the headboard - you when you seat yourself so prettily on his splayed-out lap. Greedy cunt feeding into every long, solid inch of his achy cock in an easy glide. It felt so good - it hurt so good. Fuck, he thinks he’s gonna-  “-die.” Choso rasps, jittery hands coming to rest at your waist. “Think m’gonna die- gonna- fuck fuck fuck-”
You didn’t even have to think of moving, yet - because all it takes is for Choso’s gushy tip to be swallowed up by your snug channel - the slightest taste of heaven, the slightest squeeze - before you’re being slammed down onto the plush mattress.
Breath puffing out of your lungs, gasping at the sheer stretch when your dangling legs are being thrown over Choso’s broad shoulders. Wrapping tight into a vice-like grip when he folds you in half, down, down, down into the meanest mating press you didn’t think either of you capable of.
But rationality was the last thing on Choso’s mind, right now. 
“Baby—” he’s hissing, fully sheathed inside your dripping cunt to that thick hilt of his. He gulps at the stars bursting behind his lids with each slow, lingering grind. Nuzzling into your touch, “Baby, can’t b-believe you’ve ahh- brought me to this state. M’sorry hah- please forgive me.”
And you almost feel bad - that is, until Choso’s swiping his fat tip against your spongy cervix. Still feeling every single pads of your fingers burning down his raw shaft every time your puffy cunt milks him tight. He’s jutting in jerky, unmethodical little humps - feeling less human than just sheer need. 
“W-well-” you’re gasping, when he gives such a ruthless smash into your bruisingly bulging g-spot. Bonelessly, you wrap your arms around his pale neck, tugging him in so close. A full-body shudder wracks through his entire body when you crane your glossy lips up to bite down on his ear lobe, “-how about you cum f’me again to make up for those three limited edition panties you stole.”
His jaw falls even more slack at your little sentence, a shiny trail of drool dripping from the corners of his ravaged lips. 
“Baby, please.” he’s hissing, moving pistoning even sloppier into you as if on autopilot. A cracking ah! ah! ah! leaves Choso’s mouth at every bullying crash against your g-spot, every dizzying thrust. “Anything else. Please please-”
Through his blurry vision, the blood roaring in his ears, Choso could make out your soft suckling kiss against his slack lips. “Cum f’me, Cho.”
Maybe it’s that honeyed little nickname, maybe the way the curve of your thumb glides away his mess of syrupy saliva. Or maybe it was the way your velvety walls come to form around him so tight - squeezing almost meanly. Once. Twice. 
Choso doesn’t know - nor does he fucking care right now.
“F-fuck I can’t believe-” his eyes snap so comically wide open, letting out such a long, drawn-out drawl of your name. Hips stuttering to smack forwards, “-m’cumming- shit, it hurts- it feels so good. M’cumming m’cumming-”
Choso cums - in ghosting, wispy streams of almost-translucent fluid. Withering out into nothing, until his poor, overworked cock is spurting out just blank heavals. Cumming dry, the only signs of him fucking you through his high being that shaking in his thighs, that frantic twitching of his shaft - flinching to nudge into each dripping sweet spot inside you. 
And his broken, pleading cries, “Fuck- m’buying you the hah- wh-whole store. Fuck- please, baby just-” Nudging his sobbing cock even deeper to brand at your cervix, “-just one more.”
♡ RYOMEN SUKUNA - TASTE
“You little-”
“What?” you’re leering down at the great Ryomen Sukuna. Pink locks splayed out across the decadent silk sheets, pretty face framed so perfectly by your thighs. “Cat got your tongue?”
“Not quite.” his long, rosy tongue licks a strip up your exposed skin. All the way up from about midway at your inner thigh to just the edges of your drippingly wet panties. Syrupy sweet, and see-through with all your juices. “You really think this is gonna make me say sorry for uh-”
You have to stifle a low laugh when Sukuna cuts himself off with a ragged hitch of his breath. Sharp, cursed eyes widening - just a fraction - honing in to let his greedy tongue loll out. It takes him only a split-second to catch that droopy ooze of your slick, beading through your sopping slit and right onto the middle of his tastebuds. 
“Mmm-” he’s licking that lewd little gloss all over his lips without even a shred of abashedness. “Where- uh where were we, brat?”
Without warning, you’re lacing your fingers through his surprisingly soft strands. Pulling - hard enough to make him groan - until the tip of Sukuna’s nose was just kissing at the lacy mound of your cunt. 
“I believe…” you’re smirking at the way that’s all it takes for him to slide the thick seam of his tongue between the thin fabric of your panties. Red - to match his eyes. Not wasting even a second when he lets your honeyed sweet cunt drool all the way down to the back of his throat. “Not gonnna make him say sorry” your ass. “-you were in the middle of apologizing for forgetting our little dinner date.”
You don’t think he hears you - you don’t even think he breathes. Because with one, final shuddering breath puffed out onto your quivering pussy, Sukuna is meshing his lips with yours in such a messy kiss. Fast, thirsty. Clashing against your swollen folds, slurping past your flimsy excuse of panties to latch around your throbbing clit. He’s hollowing out his cheeks to give them harsh, methodical little sucks. 
“Shit- mmpf- fuck I always forget how sweet you are.” he’s rasping, two large hands coming up to spread the globes of your ass. Pushing you up, up, up to slobber all your saturated slick down the lower half of his face - his cheekbones. “C’mon now, ride my nose- hah, use me with this cute cunt like you always do.”
Fuck, was it tempting. And it takes everything in you to tug away his salivating mouth with a loud squelch! And if you didn’t know any better, you’d have said that the infamous king of curses let out a whine - a whine - watching those delicate strings of spit and slick snap away when you hoist yourself off his greedy mouth.  
“What the fuck, woman?”
“I told you, Kuna.” you whine out, as scoldingly as you can. Wrangling against those big beefy arms trying to desperately pull you back down, “You hafta apologize.”
You’re teetering precariously when Sukuna’s entire chest rumbles with a groan, eyes rolling so sassily. “What did you want me to do?” he clicks his tongue. Baring you with such dangerous fangs that glisten with your juices in the dim light. “Had to kill off some scum curses, s’not my fault. M’not apologizing for- shit-”
Any and every retort is knocked out of his mean mouth at that heavenly sight of you running your trembly fingers between your puffed-up pussy lips. Pushing past your panties to run them up and down where your dripping wet cunt needed you most. 
“Oh?” you’re quirking a brow at how transfixed he was. Following that shuddering gulp when you roll your neglected clit between two fingers. “Cat got your tongue now?”
His jaw slacks open when you’re teasing your winking hole, glossed-up and already so pliant with where Sukuna had just dipped the edge of his soft tongue inside. His mouth waters at the memory, “I–”
“Or is it that you just don’t hah-” you’re arching your back even more to give him the perfect view. Fingers getting a bit more frenzied, circling around the very edge of that ring of muscle the way you knew he loved to do. “-want this-” Whining out, “-Kuna–?”
That was it.
“Fuck, sit-” Sukuna’s gritting out through clenched teeth. And when you’re only stagnating and hovering tempestuously in front of him, he wraps all four large arms around the small of your waist. “-fucking sit, woman.” 
You’re squealing at the force of his inhuman strength, dragging you down unceremoniously onto his awaiting mouth. With this, he’s spitting on your cunt. Once. Twice. Three whole times to add to the glistening gloss that collected down your folds. 
“M’sorry, see?” he goads pridefully. Oh, if anyone heard the cruel king of curses apologizing like this, they’d faint. Giving the fat of your ass a branding smack! Hard enough that he could feel all five bumps of his sweltering fingers on your skin. “Fuckin’ little- oh- spoiled little-” But Sukuna can’t even finish his sentence - can’t even think about it with his mind so saturated. Hot tongue mashing in to swerve and drag across those sweet spots hidden at your plushy walls. “Said m’sorry, s’this good enough for you?”
Your pussy such a sopping wet mess that Sukuna can’t help but kiss again. And again. And again and again and- “See m’sorry. M’so, so sorry- fuck just never take this pretty pussy away from me, little brat.” 
And now you’re sure he lets out a whimper - raspy, and a few octaves higher than his usual baritone. So deep now that he was just cinching your pulsing clit across his sharp nose. Murmuring, “Stop laughing- can feel ya shaking- before I cancel our dinner reservation for tomorrow. M’renting out the whole fuckin’ restaurant, so ya better give me my fill.”
♡ GOJO SATORU - Bed chem.
“It won’t-” If you didn’t know any better, you’d say that the great Gojo Satoru was pleading right now. Praying. Voice shot, pretty pink lips wobbly, pale hand raw and red from tugging on those fluffy handcuffs. He’s pouting, “Won’t work.”
He was so picture-perfect, restrained tight to the headboard with those customized handcuffs you’d ordered. Blinking his weepy, blue eyes droopily, slurring words that were all bark and no bite. 
You’re rolling your eyes, giving his spit-glossed lips a lingering little peck, “Didn’t think you were such a pussy, Toru?”
“F-fuck who are you calling a-” It makes your cunt absolutely drip with a fresh wave of honeyed juices when you give his sensitively overworked shaft another thorough glide of your drooling walls. Meshing your pussy lips with the very hilt of his angry, red cock. “Please- fuck when you’re riding me like that, sweetheart.” he’s yanking frantically on those restraints as if to hold onto your feverishly gliding body. “Think- hngh! Think I really will explode-”
“Oh?” you’re cutting through his babbles, eyes flitting over his powerful arms, those glassy eyes that just seemed to glow in the dim bedroom lighting. “I knew I wasn’t seeing things, so you do think that- ah- your powers are linked to you-”
Your thoughts are spiraling into a gooey mess when Gojo’s uncontrollably strengthened thighs leverage themselves on the silken mattress to just rut up into your squelching pussy. 
“Jus’ wanna see, Toru.” you’re huffing, reaching a hand behind your ruthless hips to palm at his painfully squeezing balls. Rolling the soft pad of your thumb over the curve of their straining texture - just the way he liked it, “Wan’ you to cum f’me. Just wanna see.”
“Using all your dirty tricks-” he’s spitting, mouth sagging open to let you plant a few somewhat apologetic kisses down Gojo’s face. “I can’t-” Another harsh buck of his hips, and with such a loudly pornographic mewl he’s bullying his overwhelmed cock up, up, up to swerve into your neverendingly sloppy staccato - right into your sweet spots. “Fine- fucking fine- hah- use me. Use me for whatever- just, please. Fuck I just wanna cum- please—”
You’re very quickly realizing that those handcuffs can do nothing to restrain Gojo Satoru. In fact, the only reason they’re still on him unscathed was purely out of indulging in your cute little play. 
Gifting you with such a sexily cocksure grin he tries to mask away his furious flush, his trembling voice with, “N-no, m’not a- hngh! M’not some grade 4 sorcerer. I’m the fuuuck- strongest, why would my powers go out of control when I cum- fuck-
Gojo’s blabbering mouth is cut off with each gripping slide down his achy cock. Molding your plushy walls to each of his eager twitches, so fucking massive that you had to balance your hands on your boyfriend’s broad deltoids to even have him reach each hidden deep spot inside you. 
It makes him throw his head back, it makes him cry out, it makes him whine. 
And it only takes a few more churning strokes of Gojo’s hips, a few more critical mashes into the spongy bullseye of your g-spot before you’re cumming. So hard that you don’t even realize it at first. 
Gojo does, though - of course, he does - fighting back against the velvety cling of your cunt to fuck you into the desk so deeply. So purposefully that he can almost feel every indented bruise of his fat tip hitting against your slick cervix, your bouncy g-spot. Wave after wave having you milking the fucking soul out of him and-
“Fuck m’gonna-” he’s whining, hips stuttering upwards like they’re pained to pull back from your heavenly pussy. If even just to thrust his greedy length all the way back in. Gojo’s breaths come out in ragged pants, chest heaving up and down. Somehow, the hairs on your body raise, and you can feel that familiar tension of pressurized atoms. “Can’t hah- last much longer. Fuck- please. M’close- gonna cum gonna-”
That sobbing little divot at the end of his angry, thick head just bursts with thick, long ribbons upon ribbons of sloshing white cum. Gliding across every inch of your tight pussy, coating all your insides in a creamy color that was so Gojo. 
It’s so much - dripping down the corners of your bulging slit in oozing little dredges, making such a mess of your rapidly overfilling cunt. Almost too much - it felt like you could explode. 
You’re almost missing that familiar little flash of blue lightning at the corner of Gojo’s pussydrunk eyes. Glowing and almost falling shut with just how fucking good it felt to have your milky cunt sloshing full of his seed. The thought- the thought makes him-
You’re gasping when the lamp by your sloppy bed starts flickering so dangerously, once. Twice. Before bursting into tiny shards that flick at the both of you - only to be stopped, falling to the surrounding blankets just a few centimeters short like they were hit by an invisible wall.
“T-Toru–” the sound of your voice makes something in Gojo’s heating body raise its dark, feral head. And he only wrenches out of those pathetic handcuffs to wrap two big, strong arms around your waist. Face burying into your skin, fucking up into you over and over and-
CREAK! 
The bed groans at his rough cadence, so loud even over the dragging wooden noises of some of the furniture nearby inching forward like they were briefly tugged by some magnetizing force - Gojo. 
Bingo.
And it’s like something snaps because you’re jolted with a sharp spark of electricity. White-hot pleasure blissing down your entire limp body, and suddenly your high feels like it’s being repeated over and over and-
“Hey- hey, sweetheart?” Gojo’s voice sounds so far away. Lazily, your heavy lids blink back your vision - when did it even become hazy? “...y’know how every science experiment has about five trials?”
“...”
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A/N. I don’t want to write a longer version of Gojo’s but the demons in me want to write a longer version of Gojo’s…
Plagiarism not authorized.
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mia-can-yap-too · 24 days ago
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pre-dating!gojo who has a massive crush on you
pre-dating!gojo who doesn't even try to hide his blatant favoritism
"i'll take over her mission. she needs rest. i'll write a doctor's note. i am a doctor. kind of."
pre-dating!gojo who constantly hits you with horrible pick up lines.
"if you keep looking that good, i might actually die. which would be horrible. for humanity.... okay, i'll shut up now..."
pre-dating!gojo who collects soda tabs so that he can trade them with you for a kiss.
pre-dating!gojo who gives you ridiculous pet names like 'my venti iced white chocolate mocha with extra syrup and sweet cream cold foam with caramel drizzled on the foam..."
pre-dating!gojo who tries too hard to be your hero, even in unnecessary situations. like when you dropped your phone and he did two backflips and defied gravity just to slam it into the wall with his otherworldly reflexes.
pre-dating!gojo who over-explains his cursed technique to you just to seem cool.
"yeah so my limitless technique literally manipulates space at an atomic level, are you even listening?? i can make space dissappear, arent i so cool??"
pre-dating!gojo who will ask for your help for the most simplest things like putting his sunglasses on for him (he asks for a kiss on the forehead for good luck whenever you do it).
pre-dating!gojo who will find a way to make everything about you. it annoys people to bits.
pre-dating!gojo who stares at you like you hung the stars, and he won't even try to deny it.
pre-dating!gojo who brags about you as if you're already dating.
"she laughed at my jokes today, thats basically a love confession! shes so perfect and oh my god her laugh its so.... shoko, you better not have your earbuds in right now"
everyone is begging that you two start dating just so he stops.
little do they know, boyfriend!gojo is ten times worse.
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a/n:- even though you didnt ask for this at all, for @deathofacupid cuz girl im lowkey down bad for u. i hope you know that i think of you whenever i write for gojo. while ik that you would love to do....other things.... with him, too, you deserve the cute and the adorable and everything in between too. i hope that one day youll find your gojo who loves you to infinity and beyond because you deserve that and more. ily bro and congrats once more on 2K!
enough of the sentimental shit
Oh, you’re curious about my past works? Well, luckily for you, all the deliveries are neatly archived! Just head over to the Archive of Deliveries and browse through what I’ve sent out in the past. Enjoy the trip down memory lane!
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holeforzenin · 1 month ago
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𝜗𝜚˚⋆ PRANKING ROOMMATE TOJI THAT YOU’RE MOVING OUT FOR APRIL FOOLS
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Toji stepped through the front door, the familiar heavy thud of his leather boots clomping and echoing on the tiled floor. He dropped his keys with a clang and sighed as he leaned against the doorframe, clearly worn out from the day.
“Hey Toji,” you said as you stood by the doorway, trying to sound as calm and collected as possible, “Can we talk for a second?”.
His eyes narrowed slightly and you could tell he was already on alert because of the serious detection in your tone. “Yeah, what is it? You sound a bit too serious”.
You took a deep breath, practically forcing yourself to stay composed. “I’ve been thinking…” You hesitated for a moment, searching his face before finally saying it. “I think it’s time for me to move out”.
He blinked, clearly caught off guard. Ever since you’ve moved in together, things had been easy and comfortable. You two got along well, no drama, no issues, so this came out of nowhere.
His brow furrowed as he set his work bag down. “Wait, what? Why? You serious?”
You nodded slowly, watching his expression shift to disarray and confusion, maybe even a flicker of something else you couldn’t quite place.
“Yeah,” you said, keeping your tone steady. “I’ve been thinking about it for a while now. I’ve already started looking at places… I just think it’s time for a change”.
For a second, he didn’t say anything. He just stared at you, his tired and weary eyes scanning your face. You could see him trying to figure out if you were joking or not. After a beat, he stepped closer, his voice dropping a little. “Hold on. You’re really gonna just leave? Just like that?”
You nodded again, trying to keep up the act. “Yeah. I don’t want to be a burden, you know? With your job and everything… it’s just better if I go”.
He didn’t move at first, his arms crossed tightly, like he was trying to process what you said. You could see the gears turning in his head, his usual confident demeanor slipping just a little.
His jaw tightened, his broad shoulders looking even more imposing as he walked over to you. You could feel the tension building, and you had to hold back a grin. Toji was a tough guy— tougher than most people but right now, you could see the concern flickering in his eyes. It was working and he looked so so defeated but also trying his best to keep himself up.
“Look,” he finally said, his voice low and gentle. “I don’t know what’s going on but you don’t need to leave. I— shit if it’s rent, I can help you out more. You don’t gotta go. We can work something out y/n”.
For a moment, you almost felt bad— he sounded so sincere like he was genuinely trying to figure out how to fix things. You wanted to laugh at how serious he was because you had never really seen this side of him before but you held back. It was almost too easy.
You let the silence hang in the air before you dropped the bomb. With a smirk, you leaned back and said, “April Fools”.
Toji froze, his eyes blinking rapidly as if trying to process what you just said. Then slowly, his expression shifted. He let out a sharp sigh, clearly annoyed as fuck but mostly relieved. “You’re a pain in the fucking ass, you know that?”
You burst out laughing, clutching your stomach because of how funny it was. “You should’ve seen your face. You totally fell for it!”
“You little brat,” he muttered under his breath, shaking his head with a light chuckle. He took a step closer and before you knew what was happening, he reached down and squeezed your cheek— hard enough to make your face squish between his fingers.
“Next time you pull something like that, I’ll get you back,” he warned, his voice playful but more relaxed. You gasped, flailing a little as you tried to push his bigger hand away. “Oww! Hey! You can’t just—”
Toji laughed, obviously pleased with the reaction. “Don’t fuck with me, kid. You’re lucky I even like you”.
You rubbed your cheek, half amused and half annoyed. “That was mean!” you whined, still trying to fight the grin that was spreading across your face. He gave you a knowing look. “You deserve it, I thought I was losing my mind for a second there”.
You rolled your eyes, though you couldn’t keep the smile from creeping up on your face. “Just wait until next time. I’ll get you back even more”.
Toji gave you a pointed look, just relieved that you’re even implying there’s gonna be a next time. He walked over to the fridge to grab a beer to calm his nerves. “You’ve got some nerve pulling that on me in the first place, I’ve had a long day, kid”
You grinned, but your heart skipped a little. It was moments like these— his teasing, the soft side of him that made living with Toji so entertaining and easy.
You knew he wasn’t actually mad. In fact, you could tell he was secretly impressed that you even pulled it off.
“Next time I pull a prank, it’s gonna be worse so watch out, old man,” you teased. “Yeah yeah, sure,” he muttered, cracking open the beer. “We’ll see about that”.
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444venicebitch444 · 1 month ago
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a/n: ty guys so much for all the love on my last post, i absolutely wasn’t expecting it. probably gonna write something about joel miller in the next few days. if you have requests, send away, ly!
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simon riley who gets a new neighbour that won’t keep her fucking blinds closed. 
he'd seen the moving truck, a pretty bird thanking the movers and hadn’t thought much of it; he wasn’t one to make conversation with his neighbors, so he minded his own business. 
or at least he tried, but it was real fucking difficult when he could see through your windows at any god given moment.
at the beginning it wasn’t even intentional, he actually found himself getting annoyed at how exposed you were. did you have no fucking self preservation sense, letting anyone and everyone look into your house? christ, people these days.
but then the fascination creeped in and he couldn’t help but let his eyes travel to you. watching as you sat on the couch on your phone, watching tv, reading, whatever. 
he observed as you came home from work, talking on your phone way too loudly for his liking, or laughing like the girls he always found insufferable in school when your friends came over. 
after only a few weeks he put a name, and every other thing there was to know, to the pretty face. not like it was hard: you had your name on your mailbox, public social media profiles, and readily available professional and academic information on the first page of his google search.
simon knew it was weird, that he should stop watching, maybe mention your lack of blinds to you, but he couldn’t. not when he saw you undressing in a way that felt like you knew he was watching, like you were doing this on purpose, teasing him. 
he tried telling himself that this was a bloody mid-life crisis, that he was too bored after retiring and needed to pull his shit together, but it did little to quell his growing enchantment. 
so when he saw you struggling with your ground floor window, a rusted old thing he’d noticed quite a while ago, he exited his home withe the excuse of collecting his mail despite his mailbox being empty and shot a casual, gruff “everything all right?”
you were polite, sweet, assured him it was nothing, just the old house acting up, but he insisted. 
he pulled at the old wooden frame with big, calloused hands, your gaze inevitably slipping to his strong, ink covered bicep, the muscle flexing as the window finally budged.
he noticed your look, of course he did, and couldn’t suppress a tiny smirk as he stepped back, “there you go, love”.
you thanked him profusely, then introduced yourself, obtaining his name right back, and offered him a cup of tea, but simon wanted to take his time. he had to think with his head, not his cock, and make sure you were the right one before getting himself too invested.
so, despite every bone in his body wanting to do the opposite, he refused “maybe some other time”
“I’m holding you to that, simon” you smiled and the sound of his name dripping from your lips like the sweetest of honies almost made his knees buckle. 
after your interaction simon got more diligent, looking for anything wrong with you, anything to turn him away, to put a stop to this; but he couldn’t.
every bit of information he attained made him fall deeper, fed his growing love for you, validated the idea he had created in his head. you were bloody perfect for him.
so he did take you up on your offer of tea and biscuits, and showed up at your doorstep.  
the sight of you greeting him with a soft smile and wearing a pretty sundress almost had him throwing his self control out the window and just telling you how you were made to be his. but he resisted.
he was a little awkward, but in a strangely endearing way. he made you laugh (god, he would die a happy man if your laughter was the last thing he heard), and was respectful, polite. 
and obviously you found him attractive, you weren’t being exactly subtle: simon knew he wasn’t that funny and that there was absolutely no need for you to grab his arm as you giggled. 
simon held onto every touch, every laugh, every time his name left your mouth like a man starved, his chest warming at the realization that he might have a chance, that you might love him back if he made an effort.
and sure, he might’ve placed a tiny listening device under your coffee table while you made a second kettle of tea, but that was just because he wanted to understand you better. to know how to please you, how to make you happy.
the ego boost he go from it a few days later as he listened in on your phone call was just a bonus. he couldn’t help the smile that decorated his face as you ranted to you friend, “he’s, like, unbelievably hot, build like a fucking tank. and sweet too! i know fucking your neighbour isn’t a good idea but christ”.
so you could imagine his surprise when he saw you come out of a car that wasn’t yours, an arm that wasn’t his around your waist. when the wanker kissed you at your doorstep, practically eating your face off, his fists clenched, blunt nails leaving bloody crescent moons on his palm.
who the fuck was that bloke? what the fuck were you doing? didn’t you like him? hadn’t you said that-
simon took a deep breath. he needed to calm down. 
this wasn’t your fault, of course it wasn’t. you didn’t know how he felt, he hadn’t told you yet, how were you supposed to know?
you were his sweet, little bird, you’d never do anything to purposely hurt him. you weren’t like that.
so any ounce of anger towards you disappeared as soon as it appeared. that man, though?
the entire night, simon seethed. he’d closed his curtains but the image of him around you was burned on the front of his brain and he fantasised. fantasised about being the one driving you home, kissing you, pulling you upstairs, tasting you, burying himself into you as you screamed out his name. fantasised about crushing that man’s skull, cutting him up limb by limb, making him eat his own tongue, teaching him to keep it in his mouth instead of letting it slip into yours.
but simon wasn’t one to just steep in his fury, he did something about it. 
so in the morning, as soon as he saw you and the asshole go downstairs, he turned the volume up on the laptop hooked to the listening device as he got dressed.
the guy offered to make you breakfast, and simon’s eyes damn near fell from his skull at how fast they rolled.
“that’s…nice, but I have to go to work, micheal” your voice came out static-y from the old computer, but the annoyance in it was unmistakable. simon knew you didn’t work on saturdays and it made him grin: you didn’t even like the bloke, you just needed a shag. and while simon didn’t exactly approve the way about which you went about it (i mean, he was literally across the street, love), he could understand that.
had you thought of him while he fucked you? had you imagined his strong arms around you? his cleft lip against your plush ones?
simon realised something good had come out of your little hook up: it had given him a courage of sorts. you were his, not this man’s who he was sure hadn’t fucked you right, who certainly didn’t love you as much as he did, and who wasn’t even enjoyable enough to keep around for breakfast.
so that same afternoon, he knocked on your door, had another cuppa and finally asked you on a date, being met with the brightest smile you’d given him as of yet, and making you promptly forget about micheal.
which was good because simon really didn’t want you knowing about how micheal hadn’t shown up to work the next day and the police had found his car abandoned, specs of blood on the seat.
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seat-safety-switch · 8 months ago
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When we were kids, we didn't have access to cool power tools. Every summer, when the soapbox derby race was coming, we'd break into my neighbour's garage while he was at work. Then, we'd use his drill press, lathe, table saw, all the fun tools. Over the course of a week, a race car was produced, which is more than the workshop ever made during the rest of the year.
Sure, we could have asked him if we could have borrowed his tools, but no doubt he would want to be there to supervise. And then he'd want to help. We'd never get done while we were busy indulging the suburb-tinged fantasies of someone who didn't take wood shop and chose instead to idly worship at the altar of Television Presents: The Fantasy of Bob Vila in adulthood.
One year, Old Man Garrett got a security system. Probably this was because Ted (fucking Ted) didn't clean up the sawdust that one time like we asked him to. The old man must have seen the footprint, and realized that he did not wear size-seven Nikes. Child thieves, casing his precious table saw! Now, our humble breaking-and-entering had become significantly more difficult than "reach a coat hanger under the door and pull the emergency release."
With the help of some of the high-school kids who were taking electronics class, we managed to defeat the security system. We did so using an ancient Japanese technique known as "distract Old Man Garrett while he's setting it, and then cut the wires to the panel." I think it loses something in translation, but you get the gist of it. That year's car was especially sweet.
In adulthood, I got drunk and bragged to some work buddies about our little scam. They responded in abject horror, because I was still occupying the weird hump in the middle of a normal distribution of "acceptable crimes." It was terrifying to them to see one of their own, one of the suburbanites, speak openly about largely-harmless property crimes. What if we had been hurt, they shrieked. Around the water cooler, I would become a pariah, unless I could make amends.
I did hunt down Old Man Garrett after that, still feeling the sting of rejection. He was still on the property, and he still had a beautiful collection of immaculate cabinet-making tools in the garage. I rang his doorbell and, when he answered, I told him the whole story. He laughed.
"I knew it was you dumb shits from the beginning," he bragged. "Fucking Ted -"
"Fucking Ted," I echoed, unconsciously.
"Fucking Ted left his library book on building race cars behind on the workbench that first year. You didn't let him drive, did you?"
I shook my head. "We ran the car into him if the hockey-stick brakes ever failed."
We had a good laugh about the whole thing that evening, and I returned to work with my soul cleansed. It's just a pity Ted didn't know how bad he actually was at crime, before he tried to knock over that liquor store and all.
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